River of Desire

A raging current flows through me

It’s a river of desire

Desire to see him

Desire to be with him

Desire to really, fully, truly know him

Yes, the desire is driven by attraction

But the attraction isn’t purely physical

I love his smile

That plays a role

But it’s his personality that draws me in

Here’s the thing

I’ve felt this before

This current isn’t new

It’s been flowing for quite some time

First with one boy

Then with another

But never quite meeting his river of desire

It feels like I’m floating down this river

Never sure what’s around the bend

I know someday my river will meet his

But I am questioning

When?

If our rivers join soon

Fantastic!

But if our meeting place is still miles away

Fantastic?

How do I come to grips with the uncertainty?

The waiting?

The unknown?

First, I need to take a deep breath

Then, I need to look around

The scenery is beautiful

Here and now

It’s lush and green

Full of life

If I always look ahead

I will never see the beauty that surrounds me

So until my someday

I’m going to enjoy the ride

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